Some days I feel like I’ve been sitting in a meeting for way too long

My heart races and I get jittery

Like I’ve had too much caffeine

I’ve gotta move! 

And I look out the big windows of my office where the trees are glittering

I’m still not sure if my job is a gateway to wealth or a ball and chain

Regardless, I know I can’t take it with me anyway 

So sometimes to keep from going crazy, I go for a run in the afternoon 

It eases my psychological and emotional pain

Running is the best in November 

The cool air brings me to life 

And the ground feels more tender

At sunset, airplanes look like shooting stars 

My husband points out the dark treetops on the horizon, in front of a golden sky 

We stare at the creek and talk about how we’re going to die

He hopes he goes first 

I tell him for me, there’d be nothing worse 

Turns out everything we have in this life is like fall leaves

It happens slow usually but it doesn’t put my mind at ease 

Which is why I need another run, please 

Maybe running is my distraction

Or my primal reaction 

To the knowledge that things aren’t right

I can’t pause the season

Or get the sun to stop lowering 

The days are short but they’re glowing

And sometimes I feel like I’m suffocating

As I watch patients die and my parents age and the sun set 

My husband and I walk the same loop on repeat 

I can’t watch the news because it makes me fret

Novembers come around faster and faster each time

When I stare at my work computer screen, I just sigh

I run before work and after 

It’s my body’s prayer, my soul’s catharsis

And sometimes just something to do because I don’t know what else there is 

But in the outdoors I see that God’s an artist 

And all the creatures on this globe still have a long way to go 

As I bob up and down and sprint through the streets 

Among the sky of yellow-pink 

I know He knows what I think 

My stride, my musings, my prayers are on repeat 

I don’t want all the money or fame 

No, just to be outside, moving, immersed in His painting 

Till my soul’s finally at ease

When Heaven and Earth are one