I was always a good kid growing up

One time I said a bad word casually

My mom heard

And that was enough

I’m grateful that in my late teens I moved in the right direction gradually

I met some wonderful friends

I wished to capture the heart of one of them

I got a crazy idea on a Halloween night

The air was cold, the moon bright

I called Kelly and explained the plan

We invited Whitney – she said it would be grand

We piled in her Mustang

Hit the convenience store

Grabbed some white cushy rolls, more than enough

Three girls loving life, we had friendship and car keys – we had everything

On a Saturday night we wouldn’t be bored

We parked a block away, under cover of night we ran

Each with a few rolls in hand

We got to that small one-story house

In front of the near-bare trees

We each chucked some white rolls, light as an ounce

They unraveled like streamers flowing in the air

White all around, catching in the tree limbs

We giggled and dodged about

A remarkable time among friends

When it was over there was toilet paper all in the trees

We were on our way out when the neighbor made us freeze

“Aww man, he’s such a nice guy,” the neighbor said

Our faces turned red

Me and my friends explained that the guy who lived in that house was our best friend

We asked the neighbor not to tell

He covered his eyes and said, “Oh well”

A few years after that I married that best friend

Kelly and Whitney were there

My dress was white like that toilet paper

Just more elegant

I’m so grateful for all that time spent

Things keep getting greater

The neighbor never let the secret out

My husband still has doubt

Who TPd his house – he never knew

Me and my friends are still sworn to secrecy

Regarding the events of that Halloween night

In our teen years, the wildest of our revelries

Good kids, still home by curfew