On Sunday mornings my dog likes to watch Meet the Press

It helps him relax, or stimulates his brain, I guess

I thought nothing of it till later when we strolled

He said, “Mama, I just turned five and I’m gettin’ old

You always told me I was a smart pup

So I decided to try my luck

I’m gonna run for President

Milkbones and affordable daycare

Good food and housing for all

The warehouses have toys to share

I believe I can help our predicament

I want to clear the shelters

Every pup should have a good family

This is my sentiment

I know you may think I’m gambling

But I’m gonna run

Charlie, Finn, Toby, Rafael – they have my back

They say it’ll be fun”

He asked me for financing

I thought maybe he was just romancing

But those puppy eyes were wide

As he trotted by my side

So this fall my pup will go on the campaign trail

I already bought him a suit and I’ll fluff his tail

I’ll trade my truck in for a Cadillac

He and all his friends will ride in the back

We’ll go cross country

With my hard-earned money

Give Milkbones out along the way

Visit the shelters, the pounds, the rolling hills

Billy will preach of safer streets

And tastier, more accessible flea and tick prevention pills

He says, “We’ll focus on the meaningful

Make a great life for every shepherd, lab, chihuahua, and beagle

No crates, no leashes, no fences

Proper training, good upbringing

All pups loved and welcomed for who they are, not just their senses”

His paws will shake many others

We’ll track the numbers

Visit D.C.

We’ll march the streets

Anything to deliver on my pup’s dream

Like in everything, he’ll give it his best

I’ll support him like he’s supported me

And you never know, you just might see him on Meet the Press

Next Sunday morning